A while back, a girlfriend's status update read as 'I like it on the corner of the dining table', and another one followed with, 'I like it on the smooth marble floor in my living room.' I have to say, that the the first time I read something like that, I was pretty shocked. I'd like to think that I'm as open-minded as the next person, but that status update was from a girl who actually bakes brownies, and sings in the church choir, you know?
And then I thought, 'Hmmm...that's pretty progressive, isn't it? If these girls are being so open and forthright, why an I being such a prude?' So I thought about it for a while. Hmmm...how about...no, too much information. What about...ew, no! So I wrote-- 'I like it in the shower.'
B, bless her soul, was online at that moment, and popped up in the chat window-'Why would you want to put your handbag in the shower?' I was, like, huh? And then she sent me a message that proves beyond all doubt that on the imbecility scale of 1 to 10, I am a perfect 10. I am the Bo Derek of the imbeciles. She said, 'The original question that every woman needs to answer as her status update, is where is your favourite place to keep your handbag? And you like to keep yours in the shower??' And even though I was turning a deep shade of red and hyperventilating in embarrassment at that moment, and though I couldn't actually see it, I know that last sentence definitely involved an eye-roll.
Then, as an afterthought, she added, 'Babe, I do love you, but you're an idiot sometimes.'
P.S-For the record, I'd like to state that I like to keep my handbag on the non-kinky sidetable next to my bed. Just so you know.
And then I thought, 'Hmmm...that's pretty progressive, isn't it? If these girls are being so open and forthright, why an I being such a prude?' So I thought about it for a while. Hmmm...how about...no, too much information. What about...ew, no! So I wrote-- 'I like it in the shower.'
B, bless her soul, was online at that moment, and popped up in the chat window-'Why would you want to put your handbag in the shower?' I was, like, huh? And then she sent me a message that proves beyond all doubt that on the imbecility scale of 1 to 10, I am a perfect 10. I am the Bo Derek of the imbeciles. She said, 'The original question that every woman needs to answer as her status update, is where is your favourite place to keep your handbag? And you like to keep yours in the shower??' And even though I was turning a deep shade of red and hyperventilating in embarrassment at that moment, and though I couldn't actually see it, I know that last sentence definitely involved an eye-roll.
Then, as an afterthought, she added, 'Babe, I do love you, but you're an idiot sometimes.'
P.S-For the record, I'd like to state that I like to keep my handbag on the non-kinky sidetable next to my bed. Just so you know.
1 comment:
I fell off my office chair in an atempt to supress the loud laugh that was threthening to escape....now i know what i must do when depressed --- read ur blog!
Post a Comment